Square Breathing
Breathe in four counts, hold for four, exhale four, hold for four.
Alternate Nostril Breathing
Hold one nostril and inhale. Release then hold the other nostril for exhale.
Serenity Prayer Writing Exercise
Recognize what is causing stress. Write down what you have to accept (other people’s behavior or decisions). Then write down what you can adjust (my thoughts, worries, behavior). Surrender to God the things you cannot control, and focus on the things that you can.
Heart Press
Firmly press both hands to your heart and hold for 10 seconds.
Stop Fixin’ and Listen
S = See their perspective (repeat back what they’ve said calmly)
A = Actively Listen (aka bite my tongue)
P = Problem solve together at a later time, not in the heat of the moment. Calmly offer, “I have an idea or two, would you like me to share them with you?”
Guiding Slogans
- 🌱 Keep It Simple
- 🙏 Let Go and Let God
- 🕰 One Day at a Time
- 🧘 Easy Does It
- 💪 First Things First
- 🫂 Live and Let Live
- 🔄 Progress, Not Perfection
- ❤️ This Too Shall Pass
- 🌅 But for the Grace of God
- 🔑 Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes
- 🌟 Faith Without Works is Dead
- 🌊 Think… Think… Think
Responsible For vs. Responsible To
can also be described as Caretaking vs Caregiving
| Aspect | Responsible For | Responsible To |
| Definition | Taking ownership of another person’s emotions, choices, or outcomes | Acting with love, honesty, and respect while allowing others to manage their own lives |
| My Behaviors (I…) | I expect the other person to live up to my expectations. I fix, protect, rescue, control, carry their feelings, and don’t listen. | I expect the person to be responsible for him/herself and his/her own actions. I connect, show empathy, encourage, share, confront, listen. |
| Motivation (I am concerned with) | the solution, answers, circumstances, being right, details, performance | relating person to person, feelings, the person |
| Boundaries | Blurred—trying to manage what isn’t yours | Clear—each person owns their own behavior |
| With a Husband | “I walk on eggshells to keep him calm and happy.” “I’ll stay silent so he doesn’t get angry.” | “I will express my feelings respectfully and honestly, but he’s responsible for his reactions. He can handle his own emotions.” |
| With another Adult | “I can help her fix her problems by giving advice, money, and time. I feel guilty when she continues to struggle.” | “I can love her without fixing her. I can listen, encourage, and set limits- allowing both of us to grow.” |
| With Children | “I must make sure my child never feels sad or fails.” “If my child misbehaves, it means I’m a bad parent.” “I’ll fix this problem, so my child doesn’t get in trouble.” | “I can comfort my child, but I don’t protect them from all discomfort.” “I can guide my child and set limits, but they’re responsible for their choices. I’ll let my child experience consequences and learn responsibility.” |
| With a Child and Sports | “I have to talk to the coach to make sure my child gets enough playing time.” “If my child doesn’t perform well, I feel like I failed too.” | “I can encourage my child to practice and have a good attitude.” “I can support their effort, but their motivation and outcomes are their responsibility.” |
| Emotional Result (I Feel) | Anxious, Tired, Resentful, Fearful, Responsible | Peaceful, Balanced, Aware, high Self-worth |
| Effect on Relationships | Creates dependency and guilt | Builds trust, maturity, and healthy connection |
| Spiritual Perspective | Trying to be the savior | Trusting God to work in others’ lives |
| Outcome | Emotional over-responsibility → anxiety | Healthy interdependence → peace. I CAN TRUST AND LET GO. |
| Aspect | Responsible For | Responsible To |
Daily Inventory
Morning Inventory:
- What am I grateful for?
- What is my emotional, physical, and spiritual state this morning? Name it without fixing it.
- What do I need today to take care of myself? (rest, nourishment, movement, quiet, connection, boundaries, honesty, ask for help, etc.)
- How can I stay connected to God within me today?
- What do I need to let go and surrender?
- How will I practice mindfulness today? (meditation, journaling, breath work, therapy, etc.)
- What do I need to release right now to avoid carrying it into the day?
Evening Inventory:
- What am I grateful for?
- What did I do well today?
- Did I take care of myself physically, emotionally, and spiritually?
- What feelings did I experience today? Did I acknowledge and express them appropriately?
- Where did I act from old patterns and control, fix, or please?
- Where was I wrong or out of alignment with my values? Admit without shame and consider an amend.
- What do I need to turn over to God tonight, so I don’t carry it into tomorrow?
Those of steadfast mind You keep in peace- in peace because they trust in You.” Isaiah 26:3

